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If you believe you have a problem with sex addiction or are wondering if you might and you want to change your behavior, we recommend that you find and attend a meeting of Sex Addicts Anonymous as soon as possible. We have found that the path to recovery begins with meetings.
By Helen Carroll for the Daily Mail. Kate Wilkinson is a psychologist and a respectable mother of three, who can be found most mornings doing the school run wearing neat capri pants and Birkenstock shoes. What few would ever guess, however, is that this demure, willowy brunette has also been diagnosed with sex addiction.
After years of therapy Kate, 39, and her partner John, 40, also a recovering sex addict, feel they have their habit under control and have been in a happy, faithful relationship for three years. Inevitably, the subject of sex addiction will prompt the usual sniggers and bar-room jokes, particularly when it affects women. A woman, who is addicted to sex? Since when is that seen as a problem, or even a medical condition worthy of diagnosis and treatment? She says her addiction — which affects 4 per cent of the population, according to the Royal Find local sex addicts of Psychiatrists, a quarter of them female — has left her depressed and anxious, and led her into dangerous situations risking her physical and sexual health.
The World Health Organisation now formally recognises sex addiction as a mental health condition. Rebecca Barker, 37, pictured began to obsessively think about sex after her youngest child started nursery school. For years I used Find local sex addicts as a coping mechanism.
In July the World Health Organisation formally recognised sex addiction as a mental health condition, a move that could lead to treatment being made available on the NHS. According to WHO, compulsive sexual behaviour disorder is defined as an inability to control intense sexual urges, despite often deriving no pleasure from them.
As a result of these cravings, Kate says she has had about 30 lovers over the past two decades — many of them brief flings.
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Lynn Anderton pictured56, became obsessed with sex when she began her first subsequent relationship with a new man after the break down of her marriage. She was married for five years, from age 29 to 34, and had three children with her husband. It had a huge impact on my self-esteem. After their separation, Kate began taking more risks with the people she met online, such as going back to the homes of virtual strangers on first dates. Roughly 50 per cent of people who suffer from a sex addiction also meet the criteria for drug addiction or alcoholism.
Stripped of the cover that had been afforded by her marriage, it was at this stage that she recognised her sexual appetite was excessive, even dangerous, and that she could not control it even when acting on her desires might put Find local sex addicts at risk. Aged 35, Find local sex addicts went to see her GP who referred her for therapy. Given her work and training in psychology, it is perhaps surprising that it took Kate so long to identify her own problem. Although it was only ever while my children were staying with their father, they always left me feeling guilty, anxious and out of control.
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With the help of her therapist, Kate realised that anxiety and her drive for perfection — she put herself under enormous pressure professionally — were at the root of her addiction. Kate Wilkinson, 39, believes if she hadn't been able to afford therapy for her sex addiction she would've been unable to form a functional relationship file image. Kate met John, who works in sales, by chance in a pub. In a startling coincidence, it turned out that he too was a recovering sex addict.
It was several weeks before John confided that he had been treated for sex addiction, which had led to him cheating on his ex-wife, and was now in recovery. Unlike drug and alcohol addiction, it is not necessary, or even recommended, for recovering sex addicts to abstain from sex completely.
Most treatments focus instead on helping them to develop a healthier approach to it. Rebecca Barker pictured had suffered with depression since her teens and began to notice brief relief when she had sex Find local sex addicts her desire became obsessive. Counsellor Paula Hall has treated hundreds of sex addicts over the past 15 years, and is the author of the book Understanding And Treating Sex Addiction. She says women often find it much harder than men to seek help for this awkward problem.
The farmer, from Tadcaster, had always enjoyed having sex most days when she was in a relationship, but four years ago her enjoyment became an obsession. Rebecca had suffered with recurring episodes of depression since the age of 16 after being violently physically attacked. In earlyconcerned that she was on the verge of a nervous breakdown, she visited her GP, who prescribed medication for anxiety and depression and referred her to a psychiatrist.
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By the time the youngest of her three children — now aged 18, 14 and eight — started nursery school in the autumn of that year, Rebecca was so down that she began spending her days in bed, rising only to prepare meals, and leaving Find local sex addicts partner to run the farm. Rebecca pictured recalls medication prescribed by her psychiatrist to curb her appetite for sexual desire numbing her sensations when she had sex.
When I gave in to temptation I briefly felt better about myself, less stressed and anxious, but there was no longer-term satisfaction — as soon as it was over, all I could think about was doing it again. In NovemberRebecca called her mum and admitted how she felt, and that the only brief relief she could get was through sex — confiding that she felt suicidal. In NovemberRebecca met her current partner Jean-Marc, Find local sex addicts pictured whose relationship with her fiance broke down due to the separation needed to overcome her addiction has decided to speak publicly about her experience to raise awareness.
She has opened up to friends and family and agreed to speak Find local sex addicts about her addiction in order to raise awareness. Paula adds that sex addiction is not purely an affliction of youth but something that can be triggered by hormonal changes in women of any age, including during the perimenopause, as Lynn Anderton, 56, discovered to her cost. Her marriage, to the father of her now adult son, broke down in and it was during her first subsequent relationship with a new man that she found herself becoming obsessed with sex.
Lynn had given up her job in market research to train as a life coach, but became so preoccupied with sex that she could barely concentrate. Lynn pictured realised she had a problem with her sexual desire after she began having risky flings with men she met online. She decided to address the issues herself instead of seeking medical help. I was unable to earn money so started living off my savings and, ultimately, depending on my partner, who earned a good salary as a surveyor. Determined that nothing would get in the way of her sex life Lynn, whose partner had a high sex drive and was mostly happy to oblige, took the contraceptive Pill all month round, without the recommended one-week break, to ensure that she never had a period.
But the pair were incompatible in other ways which led to the relationship ending when Lynn was Over the following four years, she had a string of risky flings with men she met online. Instead of seeking medical help, however, Lynn researched sex addiction and has worked on addressing her issues herself. Lynn has now been single and abstained from sex for 18 months and believes that part of the reason she is now able to control her urges is that she has much-improved self-esteem and her hormones have rebalanced since going through the menopause.
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