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And then how you, as a man, can assert yourself in the way of being a leader to try to change this overall, so it does not diminish the attraction in your relationship. Remember that you always want to come from a place of love and understanding.
Having a girlfriend by your side and to share your life with can feel amazing. Having that partner that you can Dealing with needy girlfriend to about your day, laugh with, and turn to for support during difficult times can make all the difference for you when the relationship is healthy. If you have a clingy girlfriend, instead of enjoying all the benefits that a relationship has to offer, you may find yourself trying to get some space. After reading this, if you realize that your girlfriend does tend to be a little clingy or is very clingy, here are some tips for you as you move forward. Being empathetic and having compassion is important in a relationship. Put yourself in her shoes and see if you can determine where her insecurity in the relationship is coming from.
But, according to sex therapist Vanessa Marinthat less-than-flattering portrait might not be giving the partners we label clingy as much empathy as they deserve. I think people who are exhibiting clingy behaviors are really coming from a place of insecurity.
They've probably had lots of experiences in the past where people took advantage of them or broke their trust. Here are some s of clingy behavior that are worth paying attention to.
According to Martinez, jealousy and clinginess often go hand-in-hand. If it feels like your partner is constantly keeping tabs on you in this way, it may be a red flag to take note of.
If their behavior springs less from jealousy and more from fear and anxiety, Marin explains they may continue the calls and texts, and act hurt when you finally do get in touch. Marin explains that seeing you hanging around with your super hot pals or even professional acquaintances might trigger insecurity in someone with clingy behaviors.
Beyond the expected fears that infidelity may be a concern, that partner could get lost in a spiral of comparison. More desirable than I am? Smarter than I am?
More charming than I am? Does your partner constantly post about you guys? Have they been grilling you about a person standing in the background of a picture you posted four years ago? According to Marin, this might be a of clingy behavior. The trick, Marin explains, is about understanding your limits as a couple.
3. resources for anxious attachment styles
For you, a night out might seem like a chance to let off steam and catch up with friends — for them it could translate to a night home worrying on the couch. Martinez said it could go the opposite way as well.
For people that value alone time something that is very important for anyone in a relationshipthis can present a difficult situation. This is one of those s that on a surface level appears like just an inconvenience — picture a puppy following you from room to room — but is actually veering more toward sinister.
1. they are always blowing up your phone
Showing up uninvited, Marin explains, is a that the behavior might be more controlling than clingy. This type of behavior is a big red flag, Marin says, and could be indicative of coercive control.
Clingy partners may leave their friends, hobbiesand interests behind in favor of aligning themselves with yours. If you thought the best picture Oscar nominees were all overrated this year, then they agree, all those films were trash! No matter how many times you say it, they want you to say it once more. In any relationship, all of us expect a certain amount of reassurance that our partner loves us, but clingy partners take this to the extreme.
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This might be due to their constant need to be reassured of the soundness of the relationship and to overcome that relationship insecurity. But, she adds, this is where things can get tricky, because people have different tolerances for levels of touch.
If many of these points are resonating with you but you still want believe the relationship is worth working on, there are things you can do to improve the situation. Martinez offered her advice, noting that you first need to make it a point to set healthy boundaries with your ificant other as soon as possible.
10 tips on how to stop being a needy girlfriend
According to Martinez, this means explaining to your partner the importance of spending an equal amount of time together and time apart. From here they can come to compromises. Marin adds that there may be some internal interrogation for you to work on, too.
Sometimes people can be different with different levels of needs, and that dissonance causes conflict.
2. they feel insecure around your attractive friends or co-workers
Figuring out your potential triggers and contributions to that dissonance can help push the conversation forward. With open communication, empathy, and clear boundaries, you and your partner can develop a much healthier outlook — and give each other a little space.
Vanessa MarinSex therapist. Nicole Martinez Psy. This article was originally published on April 13, By Erica Florentine and Bustle Editors. Updated: May 25, Originally Published: April 13,